think. visualise. believe. confess.

My eight-hour work shift yesterday felt longer than my five-day holiday in Langkawi/Penang.

I want another holiday please.

I feel that I’m not doing Paramore justice to just put how much the concert rocked in words.

IT WAS SIMPLY AWESOME.

Awesome is an under-under-understatement.

Paramore.
UK.
Ryan.
SET.
(:

if you’re scared, then it means you have something to lose. having something to lose, beats having nothing to lose. so it’s ok to be scared.

Suddenly, I realised the enormity of my decision to study in Birmingham. It’s my future, it’s my life. It’s so much money involved. It’s practically going to determine the course of my life. It’s like what the economists say, ‘ Putting all your eggs in one basket.’ If I screw up, I’m as good as shit, and I’ll probably spend the rest of my whole damned life kissing frogs to pay back the banks.

I cannot afford to screw up.

What is the one must-try drink in town?

Pear cider, which can be found in most pubs. It cost £3.50 per bottle.

Oh shit I am so gonna get a beer belly when I go to Birmingham.

Life is just so much more interesting abroad. The weather! The people! And the clothes!

I should have been born British, or American.

I love Singapore, but I love the U.K. more. Even America, and Taiwan.

I feel like I’m betraying my country.

Going to Hong Kong just further illustrates how lousy Singapore is.

And it just further intensify my desire for the 24-70mm lens.

Santa I hope you read my blog. Or at least leave me your e-mail address.

I just got back from Thailand last Sunday morning. Battleking was alright this time, even a little fun. At least the weather wasn’t as hot as it was during February.

This is not the purpose of this post though. The purpose of this is well, below.

Salvation to me
is the start of a brand new chapter in my life. It is the beginning of a relationship that lasts forever.

Salvation to me
is knowing that my life is in His control. It’s the assurance that no matter what happens today or tomorrow, good or bad, is part of a greater plan that will not fail, because He does not fail.

Salvation to me
is a gift. It’s not earned by works or words. Neither is it by offerings or sacrifices. By grace we are saved.

Salvation to me
is about second chances, and third chances, and fourth chances, no matter how many times I will need them.

Salvation to me
means that I am no longer living for myself, but for a higher purpose and being.

Salvation to me
is my reason for trying to be a better person, day by day, believing that a good tree bears good fruit.

Salvation to me
is acknowledging that He is Lord, and He has the final say.

Salvation to me
is my confidence that come what may, a little mustard seed of faith will move mountains.

Salvation to me
is having received so that I can give, being loved so that I can love, made whole so that I can help, and being blessed so that I can bless. It is the giving to others of what I have received from it.

Salvation to me
means that I’m never alone. It is having a friend to share your weal and woe with.

Salvation to me
is precious and it teaches me to be thankful that though freely given, is not permanent and not to be taken for granted. It is not cheap grace.

Salvation to me
is basically knowing that He loves me. (:

If there is one thing I look forward to after I ORD from the army, it’ll be going abroad to study. UK or Australia, whatever. Anywhere out of Singapore will be good. I just want to be somewhere alone. I feel so sick of Singapore already.

I want to travel, go to places I’ve never been before. See the world! Vancouver, Taiwan, Italy, London, France, Holland, Germany. I want to go to all those places the game Geo Challenge on Facebook displayed. Maybe that’s why I like the game so much.

Perhaps I’m running away. Away from the things I don’t want to do anymore, away from people, away from this same old lifestyle. I want something different, something I’ve never experienced before, something refreshing. A new life, a new beginning, start over, no worries, no commitments, no ties, no bindings. My own life.

But it’s not just that. Networking, a foreign degree, experience, knowledge, all this I will gain. I want to be successful in what I do. It’s for my future, it’s what I want now.

People tell me they can’t bear to leave behind all the relationships and ties and whatever they have in Singapore, but I’m not that kind of guy. I not the type of person who will find it hard to leave things like that behind. I can let things go, easily. Family, friends, relationships, church, lifestyle. No problem. I’m the kind of person who is totally comfortable alone and doing things alone. In fact I like being alone. I don’t think there’s any problem sitting alone in the canteen and eating my lunch when everyone else around me are in groups. I won’t feel like a loner. I’m confident, sure of myself.

To figure out what I want to do in life, what kind of life I want to lead, to understand myself better. No outside influences, no pressure. Just what I want and what I want to do. Me, myself and I.