think. visualise. believe. confess.

Noah: Well that’s what we do, we fight! You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are being a pain in the ass, which you are, 99% of the time. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you’re back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.”

Allie: So what?

Noah: So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, you and me, every day. Will you do something for me, please? Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40 years from now? What’s it look like? If it’s with that guy, go. Go! I lost you once, I think I can do it again. If I thought that’s what you really wanted, but don’t you take the easy way out.

Allie: What easy way? There is no easy way, no matter what I do, somebody gets hurt.

Noah: Would you stop thinking about what everyone wants? Stop thinking about what I want, what he wants, what your parents want. What do you want? What do you want?

Allie: It’s not that simple.

Noah: What do you want? God damn it what do you want?

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of fate
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years finds
And shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

I keep worrying. I keep asking god to show me how my life will turn out in the future. Will I succeed? Will I be in Singapore? Will I fall in love? Will I have a family? But all I get is silence. Because as much as I believe that everything will turn out right, I am afraid. Now I think I know. He won’t let me know. He won’t show it to me. But I still believe that everything will turn out right. I think he expects me to as well. I am still afraid. That hasn’t changed, but that’s because I have something to lose, so it’s ok. It’s good.

So if I believe that everything will turn out right, I will try not to be afraid of trying out everything and anything, good or bad. I want the experience. I want to experience it. I don’t want to not ride a bike just because people tell me it’s dangerous. I don’t want to not smoke just because people tell me it’s bad. I don’t want to not love just because it’s risky and it opens me up to being hurt. I want to try it out for myself and decide for myself. I want to live it out, and so far I been trying out a lot of new stuff. So far I’ve been going good, but I can do better. There are still a lot of things I want to try and I want to learn.

I’ve only got one life to live. I don’t want to forget to live it just because I’m afraid of what might happen to me or other people’s opinions and expectations of me.

Sara says,
‘I’ve been given this one world, I won’t worry it away. There’s too many things I haven’t done yet, too many sunsets, I haven’t seen.’

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ORD

LOH!

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There was a period in my life when I felt so lonely, so alone, so helpless, so lost.
I was never one good with speaking.
Slowly, I felt in love with words, and with language.
Because they are tangible, and real.
They turn my emotions and thoughts into something eternal and definite.
I can take my time to think and write, to ponder and reflect.
A few words can express so much.
Think about ‘god.’
A love so great and magnificent, so wonderful and all-encompassing.
Compressed into three letters.
The beauty of wordplay.
You can’t take back what you said, but you can erase what you wrote.
A friend once told me.

‘You say more in one sentence than you can ever in one paragraph, because of the meaning behind having just one sentence. All the emotion and feeling and thought is bursting out of that one sentence, unlike a paragraph; it’s so dilute, sometimes, it comes across as just words and more words.’

When you feel something, no matter how good or bad it is, feel it as deeply as you can. And remember it. Write it down.
- Anne Jackson

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.

Northanger Abbey
Jane Austen

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

- Teddy Roosevelt